Somewhere Between

It’s officially “Spring Break”. To me, Spring has always meant some kind of change. Whether it’s the snow melting, or prep for the next soccer season starts, or work for another concert starts. But now things are changing, or the change is becoming more apparent to me on a more rapid level. 

I’ve had a lot of time to think about things, lately a prevalent topic has been my love life. This is the longest I’ve been single since the 7th Grade. I’ve certainly had some time to think about what I want out of a companionship, and what I might need to do to make it work. I’ve also had a lot of time to reflect on the relationships that didn’t work out so well. But that’s neither here nor there. 

Yesterday, an ugly close came to a friendship of mine. Well, maybe that’s too dramatic. He was just sorta going his own way. He was the guy who graduated from high school and was all like LOLDRUGS and I just wasn’t headed that way. He and I managed to became friends on Facebook and got into a spat over some political ideas, and truth be told, this was my first interaction with him in months and at the end of it, he unfriended me. Well, he’s in school now, at least. But y’know, I think that the saddest part is that he and I sat at the core of a group of guys and that group has all but fallen apart. There are still a few who maintain contact, and for a while, I was there too, but now I sit on the outside. 

I’m halfway through my 3rd to last semester of my undergrad. Grad schools are becoming a priority, all of a sudden. Jobs are beginning to stress me out. I don’t want to be that college graduate who doesn’t find a job or make it to the grad school of choice. Typically I just didn’t spend much time worrying where I’d end up, when I was younger. Things always just sorta fell into place. But now I feel like the days where things showed up at my door are over. It’s not as though I go through life passively, I’ve had to put some serious work into making my own breaks during my latter years, and so far, everything has helped to accomplishing my goals, but I simply can’t imagine what I’ll do if, for some reason, I fall short. But that’s why I work hard, right? 

I have a recital coming up. Am I ready? Well, we’ll see. I hope that I have good luck. Facebook tells me some 50 people are already deciding that they want to go. I hope the turnout is at least that good on the 31st, I want to show as many people as I can all the work that I’ve done.

Anyway, I suppose that’s just what I’ve been chewing on lately. Now it’s back to work. 

No one is taller than the last man standing. — Courage Wolf

Marginally more involved than a status update, huh?

Ah, yes. Blogging. I recall how, oh so long ago, I used to blog via the Gaia Journals system. It’s interesting to me that I happened upon that experience in a very similar way to how I managed to come to creating a tumblr. A friend simply said I should make one. Huzzah, so here I am.  Anyway, it’s back to work for me, maybe I’ll even post again sometime. Blam. 

A person of integrity expects to be believed. When he is not, he must allow time to prove him right. — Dad